Rant

Cow freely admits she doesn't know how to 'snap' her bubble gum. She doesn't know how to blow bubbles, either (they would get caught in Topiary anyway).

Does this mean she likes or admires those who chew, and snap, and blow, and then chew some more?

Uh, no.

In fact, Cow can't understand how somebody in an office cannot understand that randomly spaced, loud snaps are at the best, a distraction, at worst, obnoxious, and Cow could go on.

That this same person sucks her teeth while eating is just another one of the many reasons Cow seizes every chance to either eat alone at her desk, go outside for lunch or create diversionary noise at every opportunity.

Moo!